The Only Comedy Website on the Internet

Hobbies: Memorizing game shows, eating vitamins, roaring, getting a little nuts, forgetting my past, slinkies, moving on, being persistent, posting, crafting, downloading the latest MP3's, finding out what's cool, backpacking, snack packing, seven minutes in heaven, silly time, petitioning.

This moment was a long time coming, but yes, it has finally happened. Can you believe that I, Benjamin Kwaffel, have taken my own life down a new path? Allow me to clarify - Can you believe that I, Benjamin Kwaffel, finally hung out near the west wing of the cafeteria? Neither can I!!!!

Not only have I discovered that the pizza over there has pepperoni, but it's like the people have pepperoni on them, too! No, I haven't tasted any of these people, but their personalities are definitely delicious! There are so delicious that I practically have no choice but to grant you with 10 of my top friends! Yeah, let's go for it all!

#10	Angela Fran
	I'll tell you what - it's not an easy to be foreign and be Trevor's friend. That's because my family has always had strict rules about that sort of thing. Well guess what! Everyone, including Trevor, has a mean blue streak hidden inside of them and with my new set of friends comes a new set of rules! Can you guys handle the new me?
#9	Juicy Panky
	What a cool nickname, huh? Hey, I just thought of something fun! What if there was a guy named Nicholas and he went around telling all these people that his "nick" name was Nick! I'm sorry, I just can't help thinking that that is so funny! As for Juicy's placement on my list, you just gotta love a girl with a nickname like that! Love ya, Juicy.
#8	Mr. Coule'
	Last week, as I was cruising down the hall looking for a little something to do, Mr. Coule' invited me on down to his classroom where he has some of the coolest computers ever! It's definitely not a coincidence that his name sounds like cool! I told him that joke and would you believed that he threw up! Right there on the floor! It turns out that Mr. Coule' has a very bad virus that makes him do that. I'm not sure if I should be making jokes about him because he is in the hospital right now.
#7	Toby Yates
	Go Trevor! What a catch, huh? Not only does he play on the real-life high school baseball team, but he practically owns every video game ever. I already told him about how much I dig video games and that I was already starting to plan our first late night double date with the Xbox and Playstation and he just shook his head back and forth real fast.
#6	D.L. Slowdown
	After about two straight days of hanging out with my new "batch" of friends (that's what I call them - reminds me of warm cookies!), here comes D.L. flip-flopping down the hallway slapping hands with everyone! He looks at me and says to me, "I've never met anyone like you." A couple of people told me that he really said, "Man, nobody here likes you," but I don't think that he said that.
#5	Bonky
	Well, of course Bonky might look familiar! That's because I was looking at the Missing Person List the other week on this very website and I came across his picture! After cake and coffee at a local cafe, Bonky told me that he was "addicted" to my personality, which I think just might be a good reason that he is so high on the Top Ten! Oh, if you could see me you would know that I am smirking right now! (Bonky, call me. Where are you?)
#4	Carly Binto
	Very few people have made me cry, but Carly had me crying from the minute I met her. Crying from hysterically laughing that is!!! Carly tells the absolute cutest and funniest stories about the tiniest animals ever! Every Tuesday morning we all crowd around her in a little circle while she whizzes through every nail biting twist and turn in the story! In the end, she always reveals that the main pet won some sort of pet competition, and it puts everyone in great moods! A day without Carly would be like a day without fun....get real!
#3	Denny
	Everyone calls her Denny because she is either working her job at Denny's or eating there at Denny's! She actually graduated last year, as you can tell, but she still sneaks back into school every now and then to tell everyone hey and what's up. Oh, she gets great discounts on all the food there! Well, everything except the steaks, but who cares? Denny is really good at organizing big groups of people to hang out! She will always recommend the Meat Lover's plate because it's the most food for the cheapest amount of moo-lah!
#2	Stace Hanson
	Seasoned readers of my lists understand how I get around those ladies - real red in the face, pimples sprouting up left and right and occasionally south, coughing up lunch, stuttering, crying, spitting, hallucinating, horny, cold. Well, Stace is definitely the cream of the crop! There is a running joke among the group that if Stace wants me in the hospital that all she has to do is look at me or brush up against me! Hello, hospital, this is Ben - table for two!!!
#1	Lance Krace
	What a looker, huh, ladies? Well keep your hands off, because Lance and I are going to be chilling out all this week, every night! Lance's dad is a history buff who loves to cook these things he calls "Buttery Biscuits." He douses every biscuit in butter and then cooks them and then puts them in "Butter Bowls!" They are so good! They even have butter on the side for you to dip the biscuits in! Delicious food is a great way to get to the top of my list and heart. (What's the difference?)