Jesus Freak
Well... This girl is
a Jesus Freak. But only because we talked her into it. The offensive meter is
pretty high on this one. We are "Lovely Labia 63."
Lovely Labia 63:
i want to tell you something about jesus
jesusfreak75454:
ok
Lovely Labia 63:
he came up to me the other day and started a conversation with me about you
jesusfreak75454:
really?
Lovely Labia 63:
you'd never guess what he said
jesusfreak75454:
what?
Lovely Labia 63:jesus
told me not to tell you, but he has quite a crush on you and he thinks you're
cute too
jesusfreak75454:
haha
Lovely Labia 63:
whatcha think about that?
jesusfreak75454:
that's great
Lovely Labia 63:
well...what should i tell him back?
jesusfreak75454:
you know
Lovely Labia 63:
i've wanted you two to hook up for a long time
jesusfreak75454:
i heard something about that and it said that god is your boyfriend
jesusfreak75454:
well i read it somewhere
Lovely Labia 63:
but this isnt about you and me
jesusfreak75454:
i know , i'm a girl!
Lovely Labia 63:its
about you and jesus and god and the holy spirit
in a menage a cuatro
jesusfreak75454:
??
Lovely Labia 63:
its french/spanish
jesusfreak75454:
ohhh well i know cuatro
Lovely Labia 63:
look, jesus is a GREAT GUY
Lovely Labia 63:
if you let this one pass you by, you'll regret it for the rest of your life
Lovely Labia 63:
and the afterlife
jesusfreak75454:
i know
Lovely Labia 63:
so kiss him, you fool!
jesusfreak75454: are you
going around to everyone saying this?
Lovely Labia 63: im
gonna get a picture of you two
jesusfreak7544: great
Lovely Labia 63:
hold him around the waist
Lovely Labia 63:
and jesus, lean in closer
Lovely Labia 63: closer
Lovely Labia 63:
not that close, you perv
Lovely Labia 63:
thats not nice
Lovely Labia 63:
was that jesus' idea?
jesusfreak75454:
what are you talking about??
Lovely Labia 63: ill put
in a good word for you when i talk to jesus tomorrow in social studies class
jesusfreak75454: ok that
would be nice
Lovely Labia 63: that is
if ms. stanwick lets me talk to him
Lovely Labia 63:
yesterday she separated us for cutting up
jesusfreak75454: well
where do you live?
Lovely Labia 63: jesus
was farting and i was laughing at his farts
jesusfreak75454: haha
Lovely Labia 63: so i
was laughing and jesus just kept farting like he had gas or something
jesusfreak75454: ??
Lovely Labia 63: and ms
stanwick was just blabering on and on
Lovely Labia 63: well
jesus, he really felt like disrupting class
Lovely Labia 63: again
Lovely Labia 63: so he
pulls up his robe and takes a big dump in his social studies book
Lovely Labia 63: and
then slams it shut
Lovely Labia 63: poopoo
went everywhere
Lovely Labia 63:
including all over ms stanwick's texas flag sweater that she was wearing that
day
Lovely Labia 63: her
face was so red
Lovely Labia 63: and
brown
jesusfreak75454: really?
Lovely Labia 63: YES!
Lovely Labia 63: well
me, you know how much i want to be like jesus
Lovely Labia 63: i had
to do something too
jesusfreak75454: of
course everyone wants to be like him
Lovely Labia 63: but im
not as crazy as jesus is
Lovely Labia 63: so i
stood up and made this farting noise with my hand and my armpit
jesusfreak75454: oh
Lovely Labia 63: it
wasnt that funny
jesusfreak75454: oh
Lovely Labia 63: but i
still got in trouble, though
Lovely Labia 63: me and
jesus got 3 demerits each
jesusfreak75454: ok well
where do you live?
Lovely Labia 63: you
keep trying to steer conversation away from jesus
Lovely Labia 63: some
jesus freak you are...
jesusfreak75454: omg
jesusfreak75454: i am
just wondering
jesusfreak75454: go
ahead
jesusfreak75454: my
gosh!
Lovely Labia 63: what?
jesusfreak75454:
nothing, tell your story
Lovely Labia 63: come on
Lovely Labia 63: i wont
tell jesus if thats what you're worried about
jesusfreak75454: it's
nothing
jesusfreak75454: i 'm
just saying go ahead and tell your story
Lovely Labia 63: well
its over
Lovely Labia 63: we got
demerits
jesusfreak75454: ok
jesusfreak75454: then
Lovely Labia 63: and i
got a spanking when i got home
Lovely Labia 63: jesus
didn't
jesusfreak7544: really?
Lovely Labia 63: his
parents are so cool
jesusfreak75454: i know
Lovely Labia 63: yeah
Lovely Labia 63: not
like mine
Lovely Labia 63: but
enough about me
Lovely Labia 63: what is
your favorite part about jesus?
Lovely Labia 63: his
eyes?
Lovely Labia 63: his
hair?
jesusfreak75454:
umm......
jesusfreak75454: his
hair
Lovely Labia 63: i like
his sandals
Lovely Labia 63: his
beard or the hair on his head?
jesusfreak75454: i think
his beard
Lovely Labia 63: do you
think its weird that he's the only kid in school who has a beard and who is
fully grown??
jesusfreak75454: that is
kind of weird
Lovely Labia 63: and how
he does miracles in the cafeteria every day?
Lovely Labia 63: i feel
kinda funny playing wall ball against him at recess too
Lovely Labia 63: like hurting him you know
jesusfreak75454: what
kind of miracles?
Lovely Labia 63: so i
let him win every time
Lovely Labia 63: hes got
an arm on him, too
Lovely Labia 63: of
course, he could just be using angels to do that or something
Lovely Labia 63:
miracles?
Lovely Labia 63: like
making everybody's milk multiply
Lovely Labia 63: and
casting demons out of the retarded kid and putting them in the lunch ladies and
making them jump off a cliff
jesusfreak75454: ha
Lovely Labia 63: and the
time he took licks for all of us when we were acting up
Lovely Labia 63: like he
was saving us
Lovely Labia 63: from
something
jesusfreak75454: i know
jesusfreak75454: sin
Lovely Labia 63: thats
what he calls it too
Lovely Labia 63: you two
are just made for each other
Lovely Labia 63: i wish
i could find a nice guy like jesus
jesusfreak75454: well
you can!
Lovely Labia 63: but
where?
Lovely Labia 63: ive
looked everywhere
jesusfreak75454: in your
heart
Lovely Labia 63:
<breaking down crying>
Lovely Labia 63: you're
right...
jesusfreak75454: you
know i lost him but i think he is back now because of you
Lovely Labia 63: who?
Lovely Labia 63: jesus?
Lovely Labia 63: you
never lost him
jesusfreak75454: yes
Lovely Labia 63: no wait
Lovely Labia 63: you
helped me find jesus
Lovely Labia 63: i
didn't do that to you
jesusfreak75454: well
for a while i mean i started high school and i forgot about him and focused on
my friends and boys and just now i remember him and how much i love him and he
loves me even more
jesusfreak75454: god
sent you to me
Lovely Labia 63: are you
serious?
jesusfreak75454: i think
he did
Lovely Labia 63: because
i was about to say the same to you
Lovely Labia 63: you
mean He
Lovely Labia 63: well
now what?
Lovely Labia 63: you're
still gonna have your friends to take up your time
Lovely Labia 63: and
jesus will be there waiting
Lovely Labia 63: wishing
you would give him more attention
jesusfreak75454: i know
but now jesus will be the first thing in my conversation and the only thing
Lovely Labia 63: well i
doubt that
Lovely Labia 63: you
keep trying to change what ive been talking about
Lovely Labia 63: aka
jesus
Lovely Labia 63: who is
such a hottie!
jesusfreak75454: haha oh
yea
Lovely Labia 63: lol
jesusfreak75454: wow
none of my other friends talk about jesus like this this is great to really
express my feeling
jesusfreak75454: i think
i should change that
Lovely Labia 63: ok
Lovely Labia 63: i dont
know what you are talking about
jesusfreak75454: what do
you mean?
Lovely Labia 63: i'm
just talking about jesus and school and stuff
jesusfreak75454: i know
Lovely Labia 63: what
other way is there to talk about him?
jesusfreak75454: but all
of my friends say they are christians and they don't even mention his name
jesusfreak75454: there
isn't
jesusfreak75454: just to
talk about jesus is great
Lovely Labia 63: i guess
Lovely Labia 63: but if
he heard me talking about him so much he might know that i like him too
jesusfreak75454:
well i am sure your
used to it
Lovely Labia 63: and
then he would feel weird
jesusfreak75454:
no he wouldn't
Lovely Labia 63: used to
what?
jesusfreak75454:
well i am sure you talk
to everyone about jesus
Lovely Labia 63: not
everyone
Lovely Labia 63: not my
parents
Lovely Labia 63: they
don't think i should worry about boys so much
Lovely Labia 63: i'd get
grounded
Lovely Labia 63: for
sure
jesusfreak75454:
yea boys they can make
you think about them a lot
Lovely Labia 63: and if
i told Elizabeth about him, she would blab to the whole school about it
Lovely Labia 63:
especially jesus!
Lovely Labia 63: he's so
dreamy!
jesusfreak75454:
who is Elizabeth?
jesusfreak75454:
yes he is
Lovely Labia 63:
Elizabeth McGommers
Lovely Labia 63: big
mouth mcgommers
Lovely Labia 63: when
she asks me about jesus
jesusfreak75454:
does jesus go to my
school too?
Lovely Labia 63: i just
say, yeah he's okay
Lovely Labia 63: i'm not
stupid
Lovely Labia 63: how
else would he know you?
Lovely Labia 63: and i
know you?
jesusfreak75454:
??
jesusfreak75454:
you go to my school too
Lovely Labia 63: why
else would i have been talking about all this stuff?
jesusfreak75454:
i dunno
Lovely Labia 63: if we
weren't friends, then i wouldn't trust you with all this
jesusfreak75454:
same here
Lovely Labia 63: thanks
Lovely Labia 63: hey
jesusfreak75454:
what?
Lovely Labia 63: lets
get some tattoos when we get older
Lovely Labia 63: and
they'll say "BFFE"
Lovely Labia 63: that
means best friends 4-ever!
jesusfreak75454:
that is such a good
idea
Lovely Labia 63: ive
been meaning to ask you about that
Lovely Labia 63: but
ever since i got cancer i forget things like that
Lovely Labia 63: thats a
joke
jesusfreak75454:
ohhh
Lovely Labia 63: i stole
it from jesus
Lovely Labia 63: he
always does jokes like that
jesusfreak75454:
ohhh jesus has very
good jokes
Lovely Labia 63: thats
what first attracted me to him
jesusfreak75454:
yea
Lovely Labia 63: that
and his wonderful sandals
Lovely Labia 63: AND HIS
CHARIOT
jesusfreak75454:
and his beard
Lovely Labia 63: that he
drives to school
jesusfreak75454:
in his chariot
Lovely Labia 63: hey
Lovely Labia 63:
remember when jesus healed that frankie kid of leprosy?
jesusfreak75454:
no
Lovely Labia 63: in the
middle of the pep rally
Lovely Labia 63: and ms
stanwick pulled his arm real hard and made him sit outside?
jesusfreak75454:
ohhh:-(
Lovely Labia 63: yeah
Lovely Labia 63: now you
remember
Lovely Labia 63: that
day was the day that i asked jesus to send ms stanwick to hell
Lovely Labia 63: but you
know what he said?
jesusfreak75454:
what?
Lovely Labia 63: ms
stanwick doesn't need to go to hell because she already lives in hell with an
alcoholic husband and life of television and cat caretaking
jesusfreak75454:
oh my
Lovely Labia 63: i
didn't understand that
Lovely Labia 63: until i
went to ms stanwick's house and i saw her getting beat up by her drunk husband
and all these gross cats running around with the tv on
Lovely Labia 63: and
then i smiled
Lovely Labia 63: cuz i
knew
jesusfreak75454:
haha
jesusfreak75454:
hmm......
Lovely Labia 63: what's
so funny
jesusfreak75454:
what?
Lovely Labia 63: im
trying to be honest
jesusfreak75454:
ok
Lovely Labia 63: and you
laugh at me
jesusfreak75454:
ok
Lovely Labia 63: you are
scaring me
Lovely Labia 63: i
thought we were best friends
jesusfreak75454:
we are
Lovely Labia 63: is
jesus coming between our friendship?
Lovely Labia 63: cuz if
he is....
jesusfreak75454:
jesus built our
friendship
Lovely Labia 63: he's
built a lot of things
jesusfreak75454:
no
jesusfreak75454:
but
he brought us to each
other to talk about him
Lovely Labia 63: how?
Lovely Labia 63: by
being so darn cute?
jesusfreak75454:
jesus is very cute
Lovely Labia 63: yeah i
guess maybe he did!
jesusfreak75454:
his beard
jesusfreak75454:
yes he did!
Lovely Labia 63: you and
that beard....
jesusfreak75454:
oh yes!
jesusfreak75454:
well i would love to
stay
jesusfreak75454:
but
jesusfreak75454:
i have to go
jesusfreak75454: :-(
Lovely Labia 63: >:o
Lovely Labia 63: hey
Lovely Labia 63: can we
chat again?
Lovely Labia 63: soon
jesusfreak75454:
of course
jesusfreak75454:
i put you on my list
Lovely Labia 63: so what
have you learned today?
Lovely Labia 63: cuz ive
learned a lot
jesusfreak75454:
i have to
jesusfreak75454:
i haven't been a good
christian because i never talk about jesus
jesusfreak75454:
i was a hidden
christian
jesusfreak75454:
but now he is the only
thing on my mind
Lovely Labia 63: mine
too!
jesusfreak75454:
but
jesusfreak75454:
you started talking
about him instantly
Lovely Labia 63: i don't
now about being a better christian, but maybe you just didn't realize how much
he likes you
jesusfreak75454:
yea now i do
Lovely Labia 63: cool
jesusfreak75454:
well i will surely
Lovely Labia 63: ok
Lovely Labia 63: see you
at lunch tomorrow?
jesusfreak75454:
you bet save u a seat
Lovely Labia 63: dont
worry
Lovely Labia 63: jesus
will save us both a seat
jesusfreak75454:
bye bye!!!
jesusfreak75454:
yea
Lovely Labia 63: bye,
friend
jesusfreak75454:
bye friend
jesusfreak75454 signed off at 9:10:52 PM.
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