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Jesus Freak Well... This girl is a Jesus Freak. But only because we talked her into it. The offensive meter is pretty high on this one. We are "Lovely Labia 63." Lovely Labia 63: i want to tell you something about jesus jesusfreak75454: ok Lovely Labia 63: he came up to me the other day and started a conversation with me about you jesusfreak75454: really? Lovely Labia 63: you'd never guess what he said jesusfreak75454: what? Lovely Labia 63:jesus told me not to tell you, but he has quite a crush on you and he thinks you're cute too jesusfreak75454: haha Lovely Labia 63: whatcha think about that? jesusfreak75454: that's great Lovely Labia 63: well...what should i tell him back? jesusfreak75454: you know Lovely Labia 63: i've wanted you two to hook up for a long time jesusfreak75454: i heard something about that and it said that god is your boyfriend jesusfreak75454: well i read it somewhere Lovely Labia 63: but this isnt about you and me jesusfreak75454: i know , i'm a girl! Lovely Labia 63:its about you and jesus and god and the holy spirit in a menage a cuatro jesusfreak75454: ?? Lovely Labia 63: its french/spanish jesusfreak75454: ohhh well i know cuatro Lovely Labia 63: look, jesus is a GREAT GUY Lovely Labia 63: if you let this one pass you by, you'll regret it for the rest of your life Lovely Labia 63: and the afterlife jesusfreak75454: i know Lovely Labia 63: so kiss him, you fool! jesusfreak75454: are you going around to everyone saying this? Lovely Labia 63: im gonna get a picture of you two jesusfreak7544: great Lovely Labia 63: hold him around the waist Lovely Labia 63: and jesus, lean in closer Lovely Labia 63: closer Lovely Labia 63: not that close, you perv Lovely Labia 63: thats not nice Lovely Labia 63: was that jesus' idea? jesusfreak75454: what are you talking about?? Lovely Labia 63: ill put in a good word for you when i talk to jesus tomorrow in social studies class jesusfreak75454: ok that would be nice Lovely Labia 63: that is if ms. stanwick lets me talk to him Lovely Labia 63: yesterday she separated us for cutting up jesusfreak75454: well where do you live? Lovely Labia 63: jesus was farting and i was laughing at his farts jesusfreak75454: haha Lovely Labia 63: so i was laughing and jesus just kept farting like he had gas or something jesusfreak75454: ?? Lovely Labia 63: and ms stanwick was just blabering on and on Lovely Labia 63: well jesus, he really felt like disrupting class Lovely Labia 63: again Lovely Labia 63: so he pulls up his robe and takes a big dump in his social studies book Lovely Labia 63: and then slams it shut Lovely Labia 63: poopoo went everywhere Lovely Labia 63: including all over ms stanwick's texas flag sweater that she was wearing that day Lovely Labia 63: her face was so red Lovely Labia 63: and brown jesusfreak75454: really? Lovely Labia 63: YES! Lovely Labia 63: well me, you know how much i want to be like jesus Lovely Labia 63: i had to do something too jesusfreak75454: of course everyone wants to be like him Lovely Labia 63: but im not as crazy as jesus is Lovely Labia 63: so i stood up and made this farting noise with my hand and my armpit jesusfreak75454: oh Lovely Labia 63: it wasnt that funny jesusfreak75454: oh Lovely Labia 63: but i still got in trouble, though Lovely Labia 63: me and jesus got 3 demerits each jesusfreak75454: ok well where do you live? Lovely Labia 63: you keep trying to steer conversation away from jesus Lovely Labia 63: some jesus freak you are... jesusfreak75454: omg jesusfreak75454: i am just wondering jesusfreak75454: go ahead jesusfreak75454: my gosh! Lovely Labia 63: what? jesusfreak75454: nothing, tell your story Lovely Labia 63: come on Lovely Labia 63: i wont tell jesus if thats what you're worried about jesusfreak75454: it's nothing jesusfreak75454: i 'm just saying go ahead and tell your story Lovely Labia 63: well its over Lovely Labia 63: we got demerits jesusfreak75454: ok jesusfreak75454: then Lovely Labia 63: and i got a spanking when i got home Lovely Labia 63: jesus didn't jesusfreak7544: really? Lovely Labia 63: his parents are so cool jesusfreak75454: i know Lovely Labia 63: yeah Lovely Labia 63: not like mine Lovely Labia 63: but enough about me Lovely Labia 63: what is your favorite part about jesus? Lovely Labia 63: his eyes? Lovely Labia 63: his hair? jesusfreak75454: umm...... jesusfreak75454: his hair Lovely Labia 63: i like his sandals Lovely Labia 63: his beard or the hair on his head? jesusfreak75454: i think his beard Lovely Labia 63: do you think its weird that he's the only kid in school who has a beard and who is fully grown?? jesusfreak75454: that is kind of weird Lovely Labia 63: and how he does miracles in the cafeteria every day? Lovely Labia 63: i feel kinda funny playing wall ball against him at recess too Lovely Labia 63: like hurting him you know jesusfreak75454: what kind of miracles? Lovely Labia 63: so i let him win every time Lovely Labia 63: hes got an arm on him, too Lovely Labia 63: of course, he could just be using angels to do that or something Lovely Labia 63: miracles? Lovely Labia 63: like making everybody's milk multiply Lovely Labia 63: and casting demons out of the retarded kid and putting them in the lunch ladies and making them jump off a cliff jesusfreak75454: ha Lovely Labia 63: and the time he took licks for all of us when we were acting up Lovely Labia 63: like he was saving us Lovely Labia 63: from something jesusfreak75454: i know jesusfreak75454: sin Lovely Labia 63: thats what he calls it too Lovely Labia 63: you two are just made for each other Lovely Labia 63: i wish i could find a nice guy like jesus jesusfreak75454: well you can! Lovely Labia 63: but where? Lovely Labia 63: ive looked everywhere jesusfreak75454: in your heart Lovely Labia 63: <breaking down crying> Lovely Labia 63: you're right... jesusfreak75454: you know i lost him but i think he is back now because of you Lovely Labia 63: who? Lovely Labia 63: jesus? Lovely Labia 63: you never lost him jesusfreak75454: yes Lovely Labia 63: no wait Lovely Labia 63: you helped me find jesus Lovely Labia 63: i didn't do that to you jesusfreak75454: well for a while i mean i started high school and i forgot about him and focused on my friends and boys and just now i remember him and how much i love him and he loves me even more jesusfreak75454: god sent you to me Lovely Labia 63: are you serious? jesusfreak75454: i think he did Lovely Labia 63: because i was about to say the same to you Lovely Labia 63: you mean He Lovely Labia 63: well now what? Lovely Labia 63: you're still gonna have your friends to take up your time Lovely Labia 63: and jesus will be there waiting Lovely Labia 63: wishing you would give him more attention jesusfreak75454: i know but now jesus will be the first thing in my conversation and the only thing Lovely Labia 63: well i doubt that Lovely Labia 63: you keep trying to change what ive been talking about Lovely Labia 63: aka jesus Lovely Labia 63: who is such a hottie! jesusfreak75454: haha oh yea Lovely Labia 63: lol jesusfreak75454: wow none of my other friends talk about jesus like this this is great to really express my feeling jesusfreak75454: i think i should change that Lovely Labia 63: ok Lovely Labia 63: i dont know what you are talking about jesusfreak75454: what do you mean? Lovely Labia 63: i'm just talking about jesus and school and stuff jesusfreak75454: i know Lovely Labia 63: what other way is there to talk about him? jesusfreak75454: but all of my friends say they are christians and they don't even mention his name jesusfreak75454: there isn't jesusfreak75454: just to talk about jesus is great Lovely Labia 63: i guess Lovely Labia 63: but if he heard me talking about him so much he might know that i like him too jesusfreak75454: well i am sure your used to it Lovely Labia 63: and then he would feel weird jesusfreak75454: no he wouldn't Lovely Labia 63: used to what? jesusfreak75454: well i am sure you talk to everyone about jesus Lovely Labia 63: not everyone Lovely Labia 63: not my parents Lovely Labia 63: they don't think i should worry about boys so much Lovely Labia 63: i'd get grounded Lovely Labia 63: for sure jesusfreak75454: yea boys they can make you think about them a lot Lovely Labia 63: and if i told Elizabeth about him, she would blab to the whole school about it Lovely Labia 63: especially jesus! Lovely Labia 63: he's so dreamy! jesusfreak75454: who is Elizabeth? jesusfreak75454: yes he is Lovely Labia 63: Elizabeth McGommers Lovely Labia 63: big mouth mcgommers Lovely Labia 63: when she asks me about jesus jesusfreak75454: does jesus go to my school too? Lovely Labia 63: i just say, yeah he's okay Lovely Labia 63: i'm not stupid Lovely Labia 63: how else would he know you? Lovely Labia 63: and i know you? jesusfreak75454: ?? jesusfreak75454: you go to my school too Lovely Labia 63: why else would i have been talking about all this stuff? jesusfreak75454: i dunno Lovely Labia 63: if we weren't friends, then i wouldn't trust you with all this jesusfreak75454: same here Lovely Labia 63: thanks Lovely Labia 63: hey jesusfreak75454: what? Lovely Labia 63: lets get some tattoos when we get older Lovely Labia 63: and they'll say "BFFE" Lovely Labia 63: that means best friends 4-ever! jesusfreak75454: that is such a good idea Lovely Labia 63: ive been meaning to ask you about that Lovely Labia 63: but ever since i got cancer i forget things like that Lovely Labia 63: thats a joke jesusfreak75454: ohhh Lovely Labia 63: i stole it from jesus Lovely Labia 63: he always does jokes like that jesusfreak75454: ohhh jesus has very good jokes Lovely Labia 63: thats what first attracted me to him jesusfreak75454: yea Lovely Labia 63: that and his wonderful sandals Lovely Labia 63: AND HIS CHARIOT jesusfreak75454: and his beard Lovely Labia 63: that he drives to school jesusfreak75454: in his chariot Lovely Labia 63: hey Lovely Labia 63: remember when jesus healed that frankie kid of leprosy? jesusfreak75454: no Lovely Labia 63: in the middle of the pep rally Lovely Labia 63: and ms stanwick pulled his arm real hard and made him sit outside? jesusfreak75454: ohhh:-( Lovely Labia 63: yeah Lovely Labia 63: now you remember Lovely Labia 63: that day was the day that i asked jesus to send ms stanwick to hell Lovely Labia 63: but you know what he said? jesusfreak75454: what? Lovely Labia 63: ms stanwick doesn't need to go to hell because she already lives in hell with an alcoholic husband and life of television and cat caretaking jesusfreak75454: oh my Lovely Labia 63: i didn't understand that Lovely Labia 63: until i went to ms stanwick's house and i saw her getting beat up by her drunk husband and all these gross cats running around with the tv on Lovely Labia 63: and then i smiled Lovely Labia 63: cuz i knew jesusfreak75454: haha jesusfreak75454: hmm...... Lovely Labia 63: what's so funny jesusfreak75454: what? Lovely Labia 63: im trying to be honest jesusfreak75454: ok Lovely Labia 63: and you laugh at me jesusfreak75454: ok Lovely Labia 63: you are scaring me Lovely Labia 63: i thought we were best friends jesusfreak75454: we are Lovely Labia 63: is jesus coming between our friendship? Lovely Labia 63: cuz if he is.... jesusfreak75454: jesus built our friendship Lovely Labia 63: he's built a lot of things jesusfreak75454: no jesusfreak75454: but he brought us to each other to talk about him Lovely Labia 63: how? Lovely Labia 63: by being so darn cute? jesusfreak75454: jesus is very cute Lovely Labia 63: yeah i guess maybe he did! jesusfreak75454: his beard jesusfreak75454: yes he did! Lovely Labia 63: you and that beard.... jesusfreak75454: oh yes! jesusfreak75454: well i would love to stay jesusfreak75454: but jesusfreak75454: i have to go jesusfreak75454: :-( Lovely Labia 63: >:o Lovely Labia 63: hey Lovely Labia 63: can we chat again? Lovely Labia 63: soon jesusfreak75454: of course jesusfreak75454: i put you on my list Lovely Labia 63: so what have you learned today? Lovely Labia 63: cuz ive learned a lot jesusfreak75454: i have to jesusfreak75454: i haven't been a good christian because i never talk about jesus jesusfreak75454: i was a hidden christian jesusfreak75454: but now he is the only thing on my mind Lovely Labia 63: mine too! jesusfreak75454: but jesusfreak75454: you started talking about him instantly Lovely Labia 63: i don't now about being a better christian, but maybe you just didn't realize how much he likes you jesusfreak75454: yea now i do Lovely Labia 63: cool jesusfreak75454: well i will surely Lovely Labia 63: ok Lovely Labia 63: see you at lunch tomorrow? jesusfreak75454: you bet save u a seat Lovely Labia 63: dont worry Lovely Labia 63: jesus will save us both a seat jesusfreak75454: bye bye!!! jesusfreak75454: yea Lovely Labia 63: bye, friend jesusfreak75454: bye friend jesusfreak75454 signed off at 9:10:52 PM. |
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