Fancy Awards That Studio 8 Has Won

Over the past few months, Studio 8's traffic has multiplied by a thousand, the spam mail has finally begun to overload our inboxes, and the website awards have been pouring in from all corners of the web like a bunch of diseased cockroaches seeking shelter from the rain. We are so egotistical and proud of our awards, we decided to make this Awards Page, which will hold all of the awards we've received thus far and all the hundreds more that we will surely receive in the future.

The Penny Pingsley Pornography Enthusiast's Award - Honestly, we think we received this award as a mistake, especially since the e-mail it came in was addressed to BigPornStore.net. The virtual post office's mistake is our good fortune in this case, though we really don't want this award very much.

Studio8.net's Website on the Internet Award (2000, 2001, 2002, 2003) - This prestigious award has been (or will soon be) sent to every website that Studio8.net has found on the internet, even the sites that it secretly or openly despises. Any site who hasn't yet received this award is encouraged to wait patiently for their turn, because it is taking a long time to make it through so many damn websites.

The Darrington Foundation's Business Professionalism Award for Non-Business Professionals - As a Limited Liability Corporation, Studio 8 Entertainment constantly strives to handle business like it imagines most of the other businesses out there handle their business. That's why all S8 employees wear hand-tailored suits or skirts, drink the trendiest iced coffees, and use only the finest of colored stationery products to compose intra-office memos upon. None of these business practices earned the above award, however. We bought it off E-Bay.

Mrs. Judith T. Persimmon E-Endowment for the Farts - This is a virtual award that celebrates the flatulence content of this site, which is surprisingly low. A site we used to run, www.poopoopeepee.net, would have probably benefited from this award more than we would, but the award was given specifically to us and we have no choice but to proudly display it here among its brethren. For the record, we are very ashamed to have won this award.

Prapples.com's "Website That Shouldn't Be Viewed More Than Once" Award - This one might not actually be an award, per se. Some might even call it a not-so-subtle criticism for this website. We at Studio 8, however, rejoice in the glory of winning another award. How many other sites have won as many meaningful awards as our site? We estimate quite a few, and now we are proud to be among them.

Golden Gold Nugget Award Nominee (2002-2003) - Any time we receive something that is golden, whether it be a belt buckle, an award, an egg, or a tooth, we assume that it is very important and valuable. Besides platinum and perhaps silver, gold is the most premium substance on the planet. Thus, we have been nominated, though not yet awarded, the honor of being one of the most premium websites on the internet by whoever sent us this golden-colored award.

Prettiest Website Employees Award Semi-Finalist (2000 and 2002) - For almost 2 years in a row, Studio 8 has employed some of the most attractive people on the web. We first became semi-finalists in 2000 when Studio 8 was mainly an employment agency for out-of-work supermodels. After the supermodels staged a melodramatic walk-out on the company, there was a grand restructuring and Studio 8 was bought out by a team of vegetarian homeless people. Nothing changed until 2002, when Studio 8 was again bought out, this time by a couple of adorable beanie babies who hope to turn this company into Louisiana's first entertainment conglomerate. Go here to see why our current employees got us into the semi-finals again.

Goat Breeders Association's Pick of the Millennium (last millennium) - Although Studio 8 has nothing to do with the ancient and sacred craft of breeding goats, apparently it still appeals to the bustling and perverted community of goat breeders. Supposedly, this organization gives out one award at the end of each millennium, so this is yet another honor for our company. However, the world is experiencing a new millennium now, so this award is already becoming obsolete. Hopefully, we will still be in the running for the GBAPOTM Award when the year 3000 rolls around.

Got an award that you'd like to bestow upon this website? If so, email it to brock@studio8.net. If you don't have one, email us anyway and we'll make an award and give it to you so you can give it to us. Also, if you'd like to receive an award from Studio 8, we do not give or receive awards, or emails for that matter, so tough luck, buddy.

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